Welcome back to another school year! I hope you enjoyed your break and are ready to get stuck into knowledge, excitement and yes, exams.
But first, I want to know what did you all watch over summer.
(this is presentation of the children's work contains spoilers)
There were lots and lots of good films over the summer, but my favourite was The Expendables 3. Basically it was about this man called Sylvester, like the cat from Looney Tunes, but he didn’t want to eat a bird, he wanted to eat Mel Gibson because Mel Gibson hurt his funny friend. Because his friend got hurt, he told the bald man with the funny voice that he didn’t want to be friends anymore and got new friends because Han Solo needed him to go get Mel Gibson. So he got this pretty girl who likes to beat up boys and a funny Mexican man who talks a lot to help him win, and then the bald man with the funny voice and all his old friends come back as well, and Han Solo flies around in a helicopter shooting at things. This film was really really good, it was exciting and made me want to run around and blow people up, but I don’t like Mel Gibson because he wasn’t very nice and hurt Sylvester’s feelings. And I think the girl was very pretty but I’m scared she’ll beat me up. So I think I would give The Expendables 3 11/10 for being the best film of the summer, and I hope Sylvester makes more films because he seems very good at it.
This year on my summer holidays, I met a tree. The tree was called Groot. He lived in space with his friends who all liked good music and were just like Kevin Bacon. Groot’s best friend was a racoon who was very angry but was a funny racoon. They also had a friend who didn’t know what a metaphor was. I don’t know what a metaphor is either so I liked him. Their other two friends were a green lady and a man who said funny things. They lived in space and all liked each other but there were bad people who didn’t like them. A bald blue lady wanted to kill them, and a blue man in black face paint wanted to kill them too. Maybe he was sad because they did his face paint wrong. They wanted to kill Groot and his friends because a man with a big chin wanted them to die. My dad said he was Bruce Forsyth because his chin was big. But then Groot saved his friends and saved space and danced to another very good song. The end.
I have heard about Hercules before so I was super excited about seeing another film and I really hoped he had the funny horse that flew Peggysus. I was a little sad to find that there was no singing, boooo. But it was still fun anyway. There was a huge man with long black hair and a load of his friends who were killing lots of monsters and men with their huge swords. I heard they were from Ancient Greez but a couple sounded a lot like my daddy. They made a few funny jokes and there were several bad men who set a big bad dog on Hercules family and that was really scary because usually I like dogs but this one seemed mean.
But the best part of this film was all the fighting. There were lots of spears and axes and green serpent men and fire and lightening and bloody bits. There was also this amazing girl who shot arrows without even looking at her target. I also saw a kid who was super cool because he got to meet with Hercules and I think that is awesome. This kid new all the Hercules legends and I want to meet him because I want to learn about them, it was scary when he nearly died. His mum cried a lot.
My favourite character was this man who thought he was a dog. He was funny but then he died. Everyone cried a lot.
But the fighting was super cool!
Over Summer I saw Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. I thought it was very good. It was all about Apes taking over the planet while humans had all got sick and died apart from some that were left. The apes and humans didn’t like each other very much but at first they tried to work together so that the humans could get electricity back. A bad human kept doing bad things though so the apes stopped trusting the humans. Caesar, the ape leader, still trusted them a little but a bad ape didn’t, so he tried to kill Caesar. The bad ape then tried to go to war with the humans, and stole a lot of the human’s guns. In the end Caesar and the bad ape had a big fight and the bad ape lost and Caesar let him die. In the end, the apes had taken the human’s city and Caesar was their leader again, but the humans now just thought of the apes as bad, except for a few humans that like Caesar. It was a really good ending but I want to know what happens next.
Over the summer, I watched Boyhood which was very, very, very good. Very good. On the surface, Boyhood is just a coming of age film, and not the first in Richard Linklater's career. After all, he made School of Rock, which is the best film ever because it has Jack Black in it!
Beneath the surface it is one of the most unusual projects in film history and easily Linklater's best ever film. It depicts the growing up of Mason (Ellar Coltrane), a dreamy boy, son of a single mother without much luck when it comes to men and an easygoing though slightly silly father. I heard that Linklater filmed this over the span of twelve years (like, that's a really long time!), bringing the same cast every year. The boy of seven grows into a young man just starting college. He was a very very good actor but it made me sad; I don’t want want to grow up, I want to stay seven for a long time!
The acting is really great and there are funny and sad moments that made me smile. It must've been a lot of hard work!
I didn’t see many movies over this summer. I only saw one that that was How To Train Your Dragon 2 which was the sequel to How To Train Your Dragon which was awesome. I hope they do more as the first one was epic and so was this. It takes place five years after the first and Hiccup is still going on adventures with Toothless, his pet dragon (so epic!) They discover that there are lands unexplored and Hiccup finds his mum. But there is a bad man named Drago kidnapping all the dragons and those nasty things to Hiccup and Toothless.
This film is brilliant. It was really funny and I could not stop watching it. I laughed a lot and the computer stuff made it look real! The flying bits and all the scenery were ace! I loved all the voices too! I totally think you should watch the film and I want my own dragon.
I want Toothless!
Hi everybody! This Summer I saw a Blue Ruin*. It's this American flick where Dwight's* parents got killed before the movie even started. Dwight was really mad that the bad guy who killed his parents got out of jail really quickly. Dwight was so mad that he wanted to kill the bad guy.
Okay, Dwight wants the bad guy dead but the bad guy might not be all that bad but kinda is and I don't want anyone else to die!
When it gets really hard to kill the bad guy, Dwight makes mistakes and I liked him better when he was making mistakes
The sun feels wrong in Blue Ruin. The dark rooms and nighttime make this movie feel righter
This is a slow movie, but, good slow. You think with all the murder they would be running around, but they aren't. The guy behind the camera* takes his time. The guy behind the camera and Dwight are friends and they SO have a secret handshake like all friends so they know what each other is thinking
The guy behind the camera wrote this too so I think he must be smart because I wanted to yell at the screen to warn Dwight.
Dwight tries to get revenge and mucks it up, so you should try to see this. See it because it made my day darker.
*Officially 2013, but UK release in 2014
One of the things I did over the summer was I saw The Inbetweeners 2. It was sick! Me and my homies was laughing bare times at Will, Simon, Neil and Jay. Will’s Mum was fitter than ever. But Will’s wannabe girlfriend was fitter. She was in 24 where she was a terrorist on that show, but in this film, she flirted with Will and when they kissed, I thought, YES get in there you boffin, but sadly it didn’t work out as usual. Will almost got lucky, but failed once again.
He still had his friends though and having friends is what is more important innit? Anyway, the film has a great story where Will, Simon and Neil go to Australia to visit Jay. Jay is doing a gap year from University and says he is enjoying life down under. He is a celebrity DJ and lives in a mansion with loads of “pussay.” But as they get to the club where he works, Jay is only working in the toilet. Once again Jay is fibbing and the fab four begin a tour around Australia and get up to many adventures, backpacking and meeting losers and lovers (almost).
This film is well rude and made me laugh. Especially when they went to a water park on the slides. Simon got punched, by a dad as he thought he was a peedo. Jay wanted to meet his fat ex girl friend from the first film, but wasn’t there. Neil accidentally killed a dolphin by feeding it chicken on the bone and Will had shit all over his face which was the funniest bit of the film as well as disgusting.
The film is all about Jay’s hidden intention, to find his ex girlfriend who’s working in Australia and the four friends travel to find her. They get lost and hot in the desert where it leads to Neil pissing all over Simon’s face as he is desperate for water. It wasn’t better than the first film, but equally as good. The TV show and films are amazing and I wish they did more. Overall the film is sick blud!