by Cookie N Screen
Imagine a horror movie where a family move in after an undisclosed incident forces the father to take up a job somewhere remote. That the family are still a little unhinged because he is suffering from all sorts of anger management issues. However, whilst there, something mysterious starts happening in the household that only the father can see – causing him to be pushed further to the edge of his mentality and making his son and wife worried not just for his health, but for their own safety. Very unique storyline huh?
And no, I’m not talking about The Shining. Nor am I talking about The AmityVille Horror. Or The Haunting. Or any other godforsaken horror movie based in a house. But nevertheless, Blackwood tries it’s hardest to strike its own voice. But doesn’t do well.
Imagine a horror movie where a family move in after an undisclosed incident forces the father to take up a job somewhere remote. That the family are still a little unhinged because he is suffering from all sorts of anger management issues. However, whilst there, something mysterious starts happening in the household that only the father can see – causing him to be pushed further to the edge of his mentality and making his son and wife worried not just for his health, but for their own safety. Very unique storyline huh?
And no, I’m not talking about The Shining. Nor am I talking about The AmityVille Horror. Or The Haunting. Or any other godforsaken horror movie based in a house. But nevertheless, Blackwood tries it’s hardest to strike its own voice. But doesn’t do well.
Ben is an ex-University professor who was fired for punching someone in the face. Accepting a new job in a tiny town (perhaps the only place that will have him) his family relocate to this beautiful house (that, come on, no one can afford on their salary). However, as soon as they get there, Ben starts having visions of a kid in an owl mask and a bloody knife. It soon unravels that there are secrets in this village and many of the residents are holding back.
Well, for a start, who’d have seen Paul Kaye as a Vicar?
Pushing that aside, Blackwood is an atrociously dull affair that hits every cliché with hammed up acting from every player here. Edward Stoppard does not have the talent or skill to hold a lead role while Sophia Myles could do so much better than the flaky underwritten role she has been given. And Russell Tovey is so much better than his drunkard performance here that does not offer any tension despite being the main suspect here. It’s flat and boring, with no level of fright other than the fear that this type of garbage is being regurgitated and packaged as something “new.”
Well, for a start, who’d have seen Paul Kaye as a Vicar?
Pushing that aside, Blackwood is an atrociously dull affair that hits every cliché with hammed up acting from every player here. Edward Stoppard does not have the talent or skill to hold a lead role while Sophia Myles could do so much better than the flaky underwritten role she has been given. And Russell Tovey is so much better than his drunkard performance here that does not offer any tension despite being the main suspect here. It’s flat and boring, with no level of fright other than the fear that this type of garbage is being regurgitated and packaged as something “new.”
I really worry for the state of womanhood in Blackwood. Though it does attempt to grasp some sort of resolution for our ladies, it doesn’t stop the filmmakers throwing in every trope known to man here. For our leading actress, not only is suffering the paranoia and temperament of her husband throughout the entire film. But by the end of it, though she makes one slip up by kissing the family friend Dominic (played by societies hero Greg Wise but here, he is a bit of a dick), he then attempts to rape her only to have her child practically die in her arms and her husband blame her for the whole thing, chasing her around the house with a knife. It’s like director Adam Wimpenny and screenwriter J.S. Hill saw Shelley Duvall in The Shining and went, “I like it but let’s do more of that to our characters” As for side characters, you have a woman who fled from her abusive alcoholic spouse only to be blamed entirely by the village for supposedly having an affair. Even the vicar who helped her treats her ex with kid gloves. Then there is a crazy lady in a hospital who is also having the visions that screams when she sees Ben because there hasn’t been enough anti-wise women in films foreboding the future events.
This is a lacklustre effort that definitely tries something knew with its “twist” but fails to develop the story well enough. It’s short beautifully, enhancing the colours of a muddy English Countryside and having some incredible shots. But this is a complete and utter waste of time and talent. The cast try their best but it is squandered on a pathetic script that uses recycled and discarded from other bad trope-tastic horror movies.
Somebody put this house up for sale, it needs to be torn down.
This is a lacklustre effort that definitely tries something knew with its “twist” but fails to develop the story well enough. It’s short beautifully, enhancing the colours of a muddy English Countryside and having some incredible shots. But this is a complete and utter waste of time and talent. The cast try their best but it is squandered on a pathetic script that uses recycled and discarded from other bad trope-tastic horror movies.
Somebody put this house up for sale, it needs to be torn down.
What Do You Think?
Is Blackwood a great horror film?
Or do you agree with Cookie?
Blackwood is out on DVD & Blu-ray Now
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